Melbourne Bound
I'm off to Melbourne this afternoon for a city break. Having not been to Melbourne before I am looking forward to observing first hand the voluntary drinking of beers in small volume glasses (a 'pot' is only a half - the standard measure in Vic). If I were a complete beer geek or ticker I would be spending the weekend scooping out some of Australia's best microbrewed beers (of which all seem to come from Victoria), however I'm normal and as such, will be keeping beer geekery to an absolute minimum and doing regular touristy things. If I was a proper beer geek, I wouldn't be going to Melbourne this weekend anyway as the Australian Beer Festival is on in the Rocks.
A brief catchup of what I have been up to over the last couple of weeks when I haven't been entertaining tickers, trolls and religious freaks who seem so compelled to read my fictionous ramblings and comment with unsurpassed addiction and regularity.
Recently I supported my country Australia in the soccer match against The Netherlands. As soccer is a relatively boring game to watch (which wasn't helped by the 0-0 scoreline), I got on the piss and consumed my fair share of Victoria Bitter. I was partially sauced before the game as I had been drinking at The Captain Cook. Here I enjoyed a mix of Cooper's Pale Ale and Bluetounge Premium Lager. After the game we nicked over to trendy Surry Hills where we ended up at the Trilogy hotel. Here I got to sample some White Rabbit, a dark hop driven bitter from the Little Creatures offshoot in Healesville , Victoria. This beer is seriously good and worth having a session on if you can find it.
I also went to a wedding in Bowral last weekend where alongside catching up with mates I hadn't seen in five years, I also put away 7 or 8 litres of Hahn Premium Lager and got well and truly pissed. It was a good wedding.
BTW - please be entertained by the ticker commentary which is bound to happen. The more they comment, the more it supports the stereotype that they are sad fucks.
A brief catchup of what I have been up to over the last couple of weeks when I haven't been entertaining tickers, trolls and religious freaks who seem so compelled to read my fictionous ramblings and comment with unsurpassed addiction and regularity.
Recently I supported my country Australia in the soccer match against The Netherlands. As soccer is a relatively boring game to watch (which wasn't helped by the 0-0 scoreline), I got on the piss and consumed my fair share of Victoria Bitter. I was partially sauced before the game as I had been drinking at The Captain Cook. Here I enjoyed a mix of Cooper's Pale Ale and Bluetounge Premium Lager. After the game we nicked over to trendy Surry Hills where we ended up at the Trilogy hotel. Here I got to sample some White Rabbit, a dark hop driven bitter from the Little Creatures offshoot in Healesville , Victoria. This beer is seriously good and worth having a session on if you can find it.
I also went to a wedding in Bowral last weekend where alongside catching up with mates I hadn't seen in five years, I also put away 7 or 8 litres of Hahn Premium Lager and got well and truly pissed. It was a good wedding.
BTW - please be entertained by the ticker commentary which is bound to happen. The more they comment, the more it supports the stereotype that they are sad fucks.
Labels: Bluetounge, Coopers, Melbourne, Soccer, The Captain Cook, Trilogy, White Rabbit
posted by Tim at
Friday, October 23, 2009
34 Comments:
You must have really angered Prescotti. He hasn't been 'round in ages.
I just shot off a cannon loaded with total, blessed care aimed your way. May total, blessed care be with you.
I suspect that Prescotti is behind most of the spamming. Thanks for the total blessed care. It is almost beer o'clock here!
It's always beer o'clock here. Almost 9pm on the West Coast. Chillin' out with a couple of Bitburger's.
I gotta get Prescotti on the phone!
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The Burnt Offering
1 The LORD called to Moses and spoke to him from the Tent of Meeting. He said, 2 "Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'When any of you brings an offering to the LORD, bring as your offering an animal from either the herd or the flock.
3 " 'If the offering is a burnt offering from the herd, he is to offer a male without defect. He must present it at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting so that it [a] will be acceptable to the LORD. 4 He is to lay his hand on the head of the burnt offering, and it will be accepted on his behalf to make atonement for him. 5 He is to slaughter the young bull before the LORD, and then Aaron's sons the priests shall bring the blood and sprinkle it against the altar on all sides at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting. 6 He is to skin the burnt offering and cut it into pieces. 7 The sons of Aaron the priest are to put fire on the altar and arrange wood on the fire. 8 Then Aaron's sons the priests shall arrange the pieces, including the head and the fat, on the burning wood that is on the altar. 9 He is to wash the inner parts and the legs with water, and the priest is to burn all of it on the altar. It is a burnt offering, an offering made by fire, an aroma pleasing to the LORD.
10 " 'If the offering is a burnt offering from the flock, from either the sheep or the goats, he is to offer a male without defect. 11 He is to slaughter it at the north side of the altar before the LORD, and Aaron's sons the priests shall sprinkle its blood against the altar on all sides. 12 He is to cut it into pieces, and the priest shall arrange them, including the head and the fat, on the burning wood that is on the altar. 13 He is to wash the inner parts and the legs with water, and the priest is to bring all of it and burn it on the altar. It is a burnt offering, an offering made by fire, an aroma pleasing to the LORD.
14 " 'If the offering to the LORD is a burnt offering of birds, he is to offer a dove or a young pigeon. 15 The priest shall bring it to the altar, wring off the head and burn it on the altar; its blood shall be drained out on the side of the altar. 16 He is to remove the crop with its contents [b] and throw it to the east side of the altar, where the ashes are. 17 He shall tear it open by the wings, not severing it completely, and then the priest shall burn it on the wood that is on the fire on the altar. It is a burnt offering, an offering made by fire, an aroma pleasing to the LORD.
Time to put on post moderation Doctor. I am disturbed by the many "twat" references. Who is the madman behind such a boring adjective. Reveal yourself you prick!
@Sausage - See these tickers are sad fuckers. How rich is it for someone to religiously read a blog and to absolutely dispise the author and content? These people are mental.
I'm not going to put moderation on though, my skin is obviously thicker than Barry, Anon and Baptist Bobs.
Well, someones been listening to my album! Not a bad attempt, but to fully encapsulate your rage, you must record the track. Stop fucking around and start recording. Let the beery world hear and feel your rage in a track of hostility. Personally, I think you should direct those feelings towards someone more deserving, like Pattinson.
1 Chronicles 23
The Levites
1 When David was old and full of years, he made his son Solomon king over Israel.
2 He also gathered together all the leaders of Israel, as well as the priests and Levites. 3 The Levites thirty years old or more were counted, and the total number of men was thirty-eight thousand. 4 David said, "Of these, twenty-four thousand are to supervise the work of the temple of the LORD and six thousand are to be officials and judges. 5 Four thousand are to be gatekeepers and four thousand are to praise the LORD with the musical instruments I have provided for that purpose."
6 David divided the Levites into groups corresponding to the sons of Levi: Gershon, Kohath and Merari.
Gershonites
7 Belonging to the Gershonites:
Ladan and Shimei.
8 The sons of Ladan:
Jehiel the first, Zetham and Joel—three in all.
9 The sons of Shimei:
Shelomoth, Haziel and Haran—three in all.
These were the heads of the families of Ladan.
10 And the sons of Shimei:
Jahath, Ziza, [a] Jeush and Beriah.
These were the sons of Shimei—four in all.
11 Jahath was the first and Ziza the second, but Jeush and Beriah did not have many sons; so they were counted as one family with one assignment.
Kohathites
12 The sons of Kohath:
Amram, Izhar, Hebron and Uzziel—four in all.
13 The sons of Amram:
Aaron and Moses.
Aaron was set apart, he and his descendants forever, to consecrate the most holy things, to offer sacrifices before the LORD, to minister before him and to pronounce blessings in his name forever. 14 The sons of Moses the man of God were counted as part of the tribe of Levi.
15 The sons of Moses:
Gershom and Eliezer.
16 The descendants of Gershom:
Shubael was the first.
17 The descendants of Eliezer:
Rehabiah was the first.
Eliezer had no other sons, but the sons of Rehabiah were very numerous.
18 The sons of Izhar:
Shelomith was the first.
19 The sons of Hebron:
Jeriah the first, Amariah the second, Jahaziel the third and Jekameam the fourth.
20 The sons of Uzziel:
Micah the first and Isshiah the second.
Merarites
21 The sons of Merari:
Mahli and Mushi.
The sons of Mahli:
Eleazar and Kish.
22 Eleazar died without having sons: he had only daughters. Their cousins, the sons of Kish, married them.
23 The sons of Mushi:
Mahli, Eder and Jerimoth—three in all.
24 These were the descendants of Levi by their families—the heads of families as they were registered under their names and counted individually, that is, the workers twenty years old or more who served in the temple of the LORD. 25 For David had said, "Since the LORD, the God of Israel, has granted rest to his people and has come to dwell in Jerusalem forever, 26 the Levites no longer need to carry the tabernacle or any of the articles used in its service." 27 According to the last instructions of David, the Levites were counted from those twenty years old or more.
1 Chronicles 24
The Divisions of Priests
1 These were the divisions of the sons of Aaron:
The sons of Aaron were Nadab, Abihu, Eleazar and Ithamar. 2 But Nadab and Abihu died before their father did, and they had no sons; so Eleazar and Ithamar served as the priests. 3 With the help of Zadok a descendant of Eleazar and Ahimelech a descendant of Ithamar, David separated them into divisions for their appointed order of ministering. 4 A larger number of leaders were found among Eleazar's descendants than among Ithamar's, and they were divided accordingly: sixteen heads of families from Eleazar's descendants and eight heads of families from Ithamar's descendants. 5 They divided them impartially by drawing lots, for there were officials of the sanctuary and officials of God among the descendants of both Eleazar and Ithamar.
6 The scribe Shemaiah son of Nethanel, a Levite, recorded their names in the presence of the king and of the officials: Zadok the priest, Ahimelech son of Abiathar and the heads of families of the priests and of the Levites—one family being taken from Eleazar and then one from Ithamar.
7 The first lot fell to Jehoiarib,
the second to Jedaiah,
8 the third to Harim,
the fourth to Seorim,
9 the fifth to Malkijah,
the sixth to Mijamin,
10 the seventh to Hakkoz,
the eighth to Abijah,
11 the ninth to Jeshua,
the tenth to Shecaniah,
12 the eleventh to Eliashib,
the twelfth to Jakim,
13 the thirteenth to Huppah,
the fourteenth to Jeshebeab,
14 the fifteenth to Bilgah,
the sixteenth to Immer,
15 the seventeenth to Hezir,
the eighteenth to Happizzez,
16 the nineteenth to Pethahiah,
the twentieth to Jehezkel,
17 the twenty-first to Jakin,
the twenty-second to Gamul,
18 the twenty-third to Delaiah
and the twenty-fourth to Maaziah.
19 This was their appointed order of ministering when they entered the temple of the LORD, according to the regulations prescribed for them by their forefather Aaron, as the LORD, the God of Israel, had commanded him.
1 Chronicles 25
The Singers
1 David, together with the commanders of the army, set apart some of the sons of Asaph, Heman and Jeduthun for the ministry of prophesying, accompanied by harps, lyres and cymbals. Here is the list of the men who performed this service:
2 From the sons of Asaph:
Zaccur, Joseph, Nethaniah and Asarelah. The sons of Asaph were under the supervision of Asaph, who prophesied under the king's supervision.
3 As for Jeduthun, from his sons:
Gedaliah, Zeri, Jeshaiah, Shimei, [c] Hashabiah and Mattithiah, six in all, under the supervision of their father Jeduthun, who prophesied, using the harp in thanking and praising the LORD.
4 As for Heman, from his sons:
Bukkiah, Mattaniah, Uzziel, Shubael and Jerimoth; Hananiah, Hanani, Eliathah, Giddalti and Romamti-Ezer; Joshbekashah, Mallothi, Hothir and Mahazioth. 5 All these were sons of Heman the king's seer. They were given him through the promises of God to exalt him. [d] God gave Heman fourteen sons and three daughters.
6 All these men were under the supervision of their fathers for the music of the temple of the LORD, with cymbals, lyres and harps, for the ministry at the house of God. Asaph, Jeduthun and Heman were under the supervision of the king. 7 Along with their relatives—all of them trained and skilled in music for the LORD -they numbered 288. 8 Young and old alike, teacher as well as student, cast lots for their duties.
9 The first lot, which was for Asaph, fell to Joseph,
his sons and relatives, [e] 12 [f]
the second to Gedaliah,
he and his relatives and sons, 12
10 the third to Zaccur,
his sons and relatives, 12
11 the fourth to Izri, [g]
his sons and relatives, 12
12 the fifth to Nethaniah,
his sons and relatives, 12
13 the sixth to Bukkiah,
his sons and relatives, 12
14 the seventh to Jesarelah, [h]
his sons and relatives, 12
15 the eighth to Jeshaiah,
his sons and relatives, 12
16 the ninth to Mattaniah,
his sons and relatives, 12
17 the tenth to Shimei,
his sons and relatives, 12
18 the eleventh to Azarel, [i]
his sons and relatives, 12
19 the twelfth to Hashabiah,
his sons and relatives, 12
20 the thirteenth to Shubael,
his sons and relatives, 12
21 the fourteenth to Mattithiah,
his sons and relatives, 12
22 the fifteenth to Jerimoth,
his sons and relatives, 12
23 the sixteenth to Hananiah,
his sons and relatives, 12
24 the seventeenth to Joshbekashah,
his sons and relatives, 12
25 the eighteenth to Hanani,
his sons and relatives, 12
26 the nineteenth to Mallothi,
his sons and relatives, 12
27 the twentieth to Eliathah,
his sons and relatives, 12
28 the twenty-first to Hothir,
his sons and relatives, 12
29 the twenty-second to Giddalti,
his sons and relatives, 12
30 the twenty-third to Mahazioth,
his sons and relatives, 12
31 the twenty-fourth to Romamti-Ezer,
his sons and relatives, 12
1 Chronicles 26
The Gatekeepers
1 The divisions of the gatekeepers:
From the Korahites: Meshelemiah son of Kore, one of the sons of Asaph.
2 Meshelemiah had sons:
Zechariah the firstborn,
Jediael the second,
Zebadiah the third,
Jathniel the fourth,
3 Elam the fifth,
Jehohanan the sixth
and Eliehoenai the seventh.
4 Obed-Edom also had sons:
Shemaiah the firstborn,
Jehozabad the second,
Joah the third,
Sacar the fourth,
Nethanel the fifth,
5 Ammiel the sixth,
Issachar the seventh
and Peullethai the eighth.
(For God had blessed Obed-Edom.)
6 His son Shemaiah also had sons, who were leaders in their father's family because they were very capable men. 7 The sons of Shemaiah: Othni, Rephael, Obed and Elzabad; his relatives Elihu and Semakiah were also able men. 8 All these were descendants of Obed-Edom; they and their sons and their relatives were capable men with the strength to do the work—descendants of Obed-Edom, 62 in all.
9 Meshelemiah had sons and relatives, who were able men—18 in all.
10 Hosah the Merarite had sons: Shimri the first (although he was not the firstborn, his father had appointed him the first), 11 Hilkiah the second, Tabaliah the third and Zechariah the fourth. The sons and relatives of Hosah were 13 in all.
12 These divisions of the gatekeepers, through their chief men, had duties for ministering in the temple of the LORD, just as their relatives had. 13 Lots were cast for each gate, according to their families, young and old alike.
14 The lot for the East Gate fell to Shelemiah. [j] Then lots were cast for his son Zechariah, a wise counselor, and the lot for the North Gate fell to him. 15 The lot for the South Gate fell to Obed-Edom, and the lot for the storehouse fell to his sons. 16 The lots for the West Gate and the Shalleketh Gate on the upper road fell to Shuppim and Hosah.
Guard was alongside of guard: 17 There were six Levites a day on the east, four a day on the north, four a day on the south and two at a time at the storehouse. 18 As for the court to the west, there were four at the road and two at the court itself.
19 These were the divisions of the gatekeepers who were descendants of Korah and Merari.
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Hmm, thanks Anon - very original
I actually read some of Bob's 'cut & paste bible stories' ... right up to the bit where Elizar and Kish married their cousins ... hmmmm, explains a lot.
Bless you but you misunderstand.The Bible has a great deal to say about cousin marriage, and not once does it say anything negative. To the contrary, all references to cousin marriage in scripture are 100% supportive. Let's look first at how the Bible defines sexual impurity, in Leviticus chapter 18. God tells us that we are not to have sexual relations with the following:
any close relative (which you will clearly see does not include cousins)
your mother
your father's wife
your sister, (whole or half) "whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere" (v.9)
your grandchild
the daughter of your father's wife (step-sister)
your father's sister (aunt) "as she is your father's close relative"
your mother's sister (aunt) "as she is your mother's close relative"
your father's brother's wife (aunt)
your son's wife
your brother's wife
with both a woman and her daughter
your wife's sister as a rival wife (to spite your first wife)
during "uncleanness of her monthly period"
with your neighbor's wife
with a member of the same sex; the Bible says "that is detestable"
with an animal; the Bible refers to this as "a perversion"
Those who oppose cousin marriage often use "any close relative" to base their opposition on. Others will say that just because cousins aren't specifically referred to doesn't mean God didn't mean to include them. They insist this list is just a general rule of thumb, not an all-inclusive command.
I disagree. Leviticus is a book of law. It is very specific and very definitive. The passage begins with "any close relative", and proceeds to describe all that God defines as near kin, followed by other sexual acts which God forbids. To say that God meant to include cousins is to assume God made a mistake. To say that it is only a general list, you must wonder why God was so very specific that he included beastiality, homosexuality, and sex during a woman's menstrual cycle. Furthermore, the Scripture clearly and unmistakably defines an aunt (a mother's or father's sister) as the parent's close relative, not as one's own.
@Baptist Bob - you don't need to justify your inbreeding to us. We understand, you assume comfort with 'God's' love as everyone else thinks you are a six fingered, five eyed freak. Let me guess, your Dad is also your uncle??
I'd be a man of the cloth if was a ridiculed ticker as well. Holy water - delicious
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